T +21

Dear Piglet,

its been 3 weeks already. Maybe time helps a bit, i don't cry as easily and i don't get emotional as easily. But it still hurts the same, and i haven't forgotten a single bit. In fact every little thing i do, everything i see, i think of you. I am so glad you called me just now when you needed help. I can't explain why, but i am just glad. And lucky for you, you came to the lecture late and left early, wasn't too hard for both of us to handle that way. Studies really can drown me out a bit. But i keep getting distracted. Thanks to people like beow who asks once in a while if i am ok. They keep me going i guess. But sigh, i still miss you very much piglet. When i get ready to sleep, i can't help but feel that something is missing. Maybe i should just sleep on smaller beds but that wouldn't help either. I really really wished that you would just change your mind and come running back to me. All these sadness and misery is making me age so much more. and my vodka bottle is steadily becoming lighter. i really have no idea when i will get over this, maybe i wouldn't even get over it, but just move on with my life so much that its just a subconcious thing.

Sasha asked me if we got back together would everything still feel the same? I think i would still be as happy. There's still so much more i want to do with you. Without you for even the next few years will equate to me not living my life to the fullest. I've found happiness with you and i hope you've found happiness with me. Now i have no idea where to start looking again. Nth seems to make me happier anymore. I guess this is one instance where money can't buy happiness. Fang, please just come back to me. Its too tedious to move on.

Bear